a few friends and i were having this discussion this evening after a few drinks at our local bar and came to the conclusion that there seems to be an ever sliding scale. there were a lot of arguments presented for and against the one-night-stand. i can honestly say that i have never done it (perhaps this makes me a little ill-equiped to judge?) and as frustrated as i may have been in those between-boyfriend periods i can't bring myself to do it. 'silly' thought the biggest argument against the one night stand was a saftey factor. not just whether they where an axe murderer (not high chances really if we are honest.....i don't know many that hand out in bars and i hardly think you are gonna get that kinda weapon past even the slackest bouncer) but the possibility that you may be taking home someone with certain fetishes. yep. that med school graduate with the typical spiky hair and slightly metro-sexual, ryan-seacrest-like-highlights may have a passion for handcuffin women and whipping them!!! although i had to agree there was some chance of this happening unless such fantasies are very perverted the more adventurous among us will likely say "that all you got? you should see what i brought."

anyway, with a med student is it far more likely he is gonna open you up and sell your liver on the black market though.

the metro dude said, although he had done it in the past, at his age there seemed little point. he wanted a little more. whats the point if you don't know the person and won't ever see them again? they could be anyone and you just won't know. in the end we all lie, or to put it more nicely, put our best foot forward when we meet people for the first time. so who knows what people are hiding. the metro dude said that all it really left him with was hte desire to take the girl out to breakfast the next morning so as not to seem like a really bad guy who was just using her. ten points for effort said the girls.

i had personally said on previous occasions that there is always the problem of what to say. when you wake up sober next to what's-his-name in the morning what are you planning on saying? what if you can't even remember their name? what if they are dead ugly and now they are stuck in your bed, half comotosed from the several bottles of tequila? guys i know have however suggested solutions to these problems. chocolate bear, ever the dirty bugger, pointed out the the girl simply wouldn't be there in the morning. put her in a cab as soon as you're done. in everyone's best interests to avoid uncomfortable conversations in the morning he thought. the good guy suggested that should the girl still be there in the morning "shall we have sex again" is always a good ice-breaker. hhhmmm. not quite breakfast in bed and an invitation to meet the mother.

i suppose there are other arguments such as the fact that with someone you don't know they are simply not going to know what you are into. so can it really even be that good as as good as sex might be with somoene you are in a relationship with?

perhaps, with my somewhat traditional attitude, i am a little outdated. although i do not personally have a problem with my girlfriends that choose to go out and have one-night-stands the need to feel comfortable wiht someone i'm going to be that intimate with stops me. maybe a fuck-buddy is the answer.....that reliable guy you can call on for those between-boyfriend times when the frustration has you peeling the labels of bottles and biting the heads off innocent bystanders in hallways.

what do you think? does it devalue sex when you go out and just do it with any old person in a bar or is it really just that......just a physical thing that in the end doesn't mean very much?